Last Friday, I faked a doctor’s appointment at the request of a coworker that apparently didn’t want our boss Willard to know that he had a job interview. Explanation here.
Let’s just say that completely and totally backfired.
The department is undergoing some restructuring, so everyone was on the lookout for unusual things. Simon, who was also in on it, was absent. Melvin, for whom I was dressing up, wore a jacket for most of the day and was pretty inconspicuous. So there I am with slacks, a tie, and suspenders. Since last time I said that I was dressing up to see the dentist, this time I decided I would be even less credible and say that I was going to see an anesthesiologist. Why would someone make an appointment with an anesthesiologist? For the same reason they’d dress up to go see the dentist.
I get there and Franky asks if I have a dentists appointment and I tell him about the anesthesiologist. That immediately garners Willard’s attention. Willard, who has always been more than tolerant of people looking for better work, pulls me in to a conference room.
“So what kind of pay increase would it take to get you to forego appointments with the dentist or anesthesiologist? Willard has just been given the authority to allocate budgets and is actually in a position to give me a raise, so this isn’t a hypothetical question anymore. Except that I didn’t actually have a job interview and now I was going to have to explain it to him. It’s not easy to put a positive spin on pretending to have a job interview when you don’t, because it sounds like you’re trying to run some sort of scam. And I can’t even tell him what’s going on because I’m doing this to cover for someone else.
I told him that I would need to explain something to him and that I would after work. He left work immediately after 5 so I didn’t get the chance to. So tomorrow I have to figure out what exactly to say and how to say it.
Just as Dante Hicks wasn’t supposed to be there that day, I wasn’t even supposed to be dressed up that day. Friday is the one day of the week when I want to dress down. Mumble-grumble.
This is better than General Hospital…
Comment by InterstellarLass — November 14, 2005 @ 5:51 pm
More like a sitcom, I think. Don’t they always seem to start off with one little lie and hilarity ensuing trying to keep that lie covered up?
I told Willard about it today and he showed no signs of having a problem with it.
Comment by trumwill — November 15, 2005 @ 12:01 am
Seems like a better approach to retention than my company. My boss pulled me aside to “practice” firing the suspected interviewee - a clear message if ever there was one. More tales from the insanity of the cubicle world at www.cubigirl.com
I’m not sure how comforting it is to know others go through the same or more ridiculous antics daily - but you sure write well about it all. Thank you!
Comment by Cubigirl — November 15, 2005 @ 9:07 pm