Two such people were Jonah and Ezra Weatherby. There were only three Jewish kids that went to my elementary school and the Weatherby Twins were two of them. I didn’t realize at the time what a non-Jewish name Weatherby was, though I later found out that their father was Catholic and that they had been tapped for their mothers religion. Their mother was very, very Jewish in appearance and demeanor. The Twins got some of the dark features from her, but that was about it.
I got to know Jonah Weatherby first because we were in the same kindergarten class together. The two kindergarten classes at West Oak Elementary were mostly separated by age, though they made an exception in the case of the twins in order to split them up. Since Jonah was a few minutes or an hour or whatever older than Ezra, he got to be in the old kids class with me. Always seemed odd to me because Ezra seemed to be the more mature of the two. Maybe he had something to prove. They were identical twins and the only way that you could tell them apart physically was Jonah’s duck curl in back. I suppose that you have to mark some sort of difference to keep from going insane.
By the time they got to high school, their physical differences had become much more pronounced. Jonah got heavy in the stomach and had a slouching posture while Ezra seemed more “broad” than heavy with his weight more evenly distributed. Also notable is that Jonah had become something of a geek with an interest in geeky things. No surprise that he remained the one I talked to most, though since they were both honors students I didn’t talk to either very often. Ezra became a theater dude and developed a winning smile.
Looking at the two of them, I’ve often wondered what it would be like to have an identical twin brother. When I look at my own brothers, the differences make comparison difficult. Ollie is adopted so he’s dealing with a set of genes that Mitch and I aren’t. So when Ollie became the more athletic and popular than Mitch, there wasn’t the rivalry that you’d more likely see between two brothers in the same grade. Mitch and I were three or so years apart, so there wasn’t much in the way of competition there, either. He was ahead of me in every way and it was unavoidable. Even if we’d been fraternal, though, our common parents and heritage only goes so far. I got a creative trait that he didn’t and he got… a lot of other… traits that I didn’t.
If you have an identical twin, though, it would seem to me that everything changes. You suddenly have a benchmark with which to gauge your success. It’s difficult to impossible to dismiss your relative shortcomings or have your relative successes explained away. If I had a twin sibling that went on a first date before I did or had a higher GPA that was the sort of thing that would drive me insane. I’m not an inherently competitive person, but that’s partially because ever since I was little I was told that I was developmentally stunted. So in a sense anything I did was an achievement.
Of course, the downside to this is that I never had to try very hard. Because the experts had me pegged wrong, I was left in a situation where I only had to try a very little to meet or exceed expectations. Sometimes I wonder where I would be if my parents had held me to the same standard that they held Mitch and Ollie. Sometimes I’m grateful that they recognized that I wasn’t him (and even if I hadn’t been pegged wrong, I still wouldn’t have done as well as he did), though at other times I think I could have accomplished a lot more if more had been expected of me.
Anyway, back to the Weatherbys. By the time we were all in high school, it was had not to say that Ezra wasn’t “ahead” of Jonah. Ezra was in better shape, was relatively popular, seemed to have more charisma, and was comparably good scholastically. Most of the above thoughts about my brothers and I were the product of thinking about what it would be like to be Jonah and perceptively behind my twin sibling and not really being able to cite any genetic reason why that should be the case.
Apparently in the intervening years between high school and the reunion, their fates flopped. They both went off to the University of Delosa together where Jonah excelled and Ezra did not. Jonah had an advanced degree and was working in some super lab somewhere while Ezra was struggling to get his masters. Ezra had gained something of an acerbic demeanor, more arrogant than actually charismatic. Jonah had become somewhat arrogant, too. Both of them had always been… confident in their abilities… but it was usually inwardly directed pride rather than outwardly directed scorn. Both, interestingly enough, had become anti-government, right-wing loons to the point of making Ron Paul look like a pragmatist.
While at DU, Ezra had ballooned up to 300 pounds or so, though he’d lost a lot of it by the time of the reunion. I don’t know whether it was their builds had gotten more similar or just that I hadn’t had time to differentiate their appearance in my mind, but I had a lot of difficulty telling them apart. Too bad that duck curls have gone so out of style.
Both, interestingly enough, had become anti-government, right-wing loons to the point of making Ron Paul look like a pragmatist.
So, they both went against the Jewish standard. And, they developed the personalities and unpopular views of unpopular people. Even the one who was popular in childhood did this. Why?
Was there a shortage of Jewish people at University of Delosa? Perhaps they were marginalized in some way as they grew older. Perhaps it hit Ezra harder, since he grew up feeling liked.
Comment by Spungen — May 26, 2008 @ 1:08 am
Interesting that you didn’t qualify for the honors classes. Was it a test-based decision? Or were the standards higher at your school? I’m used to thinking of “honors” as “college prep,” and you did go to college.
Comment by Spungen — May 26, 2008 @ 1:11 am
Honors and college prep are distinct. College prep is for students expected to go to college, and honors is for students expected to go to a selective college.
Comment by Brandon Berg — May 26, 2008 @ 4:16 am
A tall (188 cm), muscular guy,can still look decent at 250 pounds. 300 pounds is too much though. How tall was Ezra?
Comment by Gannon — May 26, 2008 @ 8:36 am
A serious question? When will the US change to using a metric system? Using pounds and feet is as weird as having high AOC!!!!
Comment by Gannon — May 26, 2008 @ 8:40 am
Honors and college prep are distinct. College prep is for students expected to go to college, and honors is for students expected to go to a selective college.
It was that way in theory at my high school, but in practice there wasn’t much difference between the college attended by the college prep students and the honors students. I was in college prep and ended up going to a reasonably selective college. As cynical as it may sound, it really seemed as if honors was primarily for quiet obedient teachers’ pet types, not necessarily the very best academically. In fact it was surely no coincidence that boys accounted for less than 20% of the honors students.
While there was little academic difference between college prep and honors, there was a massive gulf between college prep and the business/vocational tracks that would make the Grand Canyon jealous. A few of the students in those tracks may have made it to the local community college or perhaps a directional university, but for most of them it was straight from high school to the job market … if they were lucky.
Comment by Peter — May 26, 2008 @ 9:34 am
So, they both went against the Jewish standard {…} Why?
Hard to say for sure. They probably went with right-wing rather than left-wing radical politics because their father is conservative. I don’t know Mr Weatherby’s politics for sure, but I do remember a conversation in early grade school with Jonah wherein he expressed rabid admiration for Ronald Reagan. Being that he was like 9 at the time, I suspect he got that perspective from somewhere.
That might explain their orientation, but not their extremism. Or why they both seemed equally affected. Might have something to do with a sense of superiority and frustration not-uncommon among geek-types.
Was there a shortage of Jewish people at University of Delosa?
Almost certainly. There aren’t a whole lot of Jewish people in Delosa at all (especially when you leave Colosse). Plus, for a large state university in USN&WR’s first or second tier, DU has a rather Dixie-conservative student body. Knowing that they went to that school, if asked I would have incorrectly guessed that they’d had whatever conservatism they’d previously had sapped out of them the same way that my friend Clint’s religion was sapped out of him by the extremely religious school that he went to.
Comment by trumwill — May 26, 2008 @ 8:43 pm
Interesting that you didn’t qualify for the honors classes. Was it a test-based decision? Or were the standards higher at your school?
Not the former, partially the latter. Tracking began at intermediate school while my grades were not yet as high as they would get. Then, once it started, it was hard to make the jump (and I was not sufficiently motivated). Had tracking began one year later than it did, I might have been thrust into honors in some classes. There was talk about putting me through the jump for math, but the teacher decided against it.
There were basically four levels at my high school. There were those that graduated With Honors, those that graduated on the Advanced Plan, regular graduates, and attendance certificatees. The first group was the club that the Weatherbys belonged in that I didn’t. The second was simply for kids that had elected to take college prep classes (I was in this group). The third group met the minimum requirements. The last group didn’t meet the minimum requirements (usually because of some learning disability) but had gone through everything the school was prepared to have them go through.
What was very important about this story from a while back is that had my mother waived me from the standardized tests, I would have been in the last group and college would have been unlikely.
Comment by trumwill — May 26, 2008 @ 8:53 pm
How tall was Ezra?
I’d say about 6′0″? He had been lifting weights when I met him at the reunion, but I was lead to believe that prior to his losing the weight it was not muscle and that the weight-lifting was caused by the weight and not vice-versa.
When will the US change to using a metric system?
That shipped has sailed in the US, at least for the time being. I don’t see the US going metric until our trading partners force us to, which I don’t see happening any time soon. Oddly, I thought I actually wrote a post on the US and the metric system, but if I did I can’t find it.
Comment by trumwill — May 26, 2008 @ 9:01 pm
I, too, was struck by their arrogance. Their sense of humor was still there, and they’re definitely sharp guys, but I couldn’t help but shake a sense of “man, what a shame those two haven’t amounted to more.”
I find myself wondering what their parents think about where they are now, and whether there are things they think they could have done differently. We’re starting to get serious about parenthood, and the concept of “good kids gone bad” is rather frightening.
Comment by Linus — May 27, 2008 @ 11:11 am
Since you were in honors classes you probably knew them better than I did, Linus. Were they like that in high school?
I would be proud enough of what they’ve done with themselves (graduating with advanced degrees from a good university and all), though I would wonder where I went wrong with their attitude.
As for the subject of parenting foul-ups and good kids gone bad, that’s been a topic of interest on this site at various points. Here is a list of posts that might be of interest:
Good Boys and Girls
Good Boys and Girls: The Backlash
Wayward Sons & Daughters
Adventures in Poor Tutelage
My Mother’s Quiet Revenge
Comment by trumwill — May 28, 2008 @ 8:22 pm